Newcomer's Guide to Pattaya

Well - coming to Pattaya can be a strange and bewildering experience for a newcomer. And there are very few people who will tell you how the "system" works. With a bit of luck this guide will help you and "hold your hand" through the first experiences. I'll spend some time guiding you through - just sit back and read all about it!

First decide on an area you want to walk round. The clubs start to open up around 8 pm although the bars and massage places are often open earlier. Don’t leave it too late on your first wander round. Ignore the calls from the barkers and door staff who sometimes can be very aggressive and have a drink in a bar to start with. If it’s a host bar you will get a (cute) waiter come and serve you. Sometimes boys come and sit and chat with you. If you don’t want to chat, make that obvious, and if you like the look of any particular boy or waiter, beckon them over and chat away! It’s normal to buy them a drink as we get a (small) commission from that – maybe 10 Baht – and this helps supplement their wages.

Let’s assume that you don’t want to take this particular boy away, it just didn’t click. When you finish just give him a tip – around 50 to 100 Baht is fine assuming nothing has gone on, in the way of hanky panky!

So now you head into a club. Here the barkers and door boys will really try to get you in. Make a point of saying to them that you just want a look, walk to the doorway and look in. Most of the clubs are set up with a stage on which a number of lads, scantily clad will be standing. If you like the general look of the place, allow the door man to take you to a seat and order a drink. Normally boys don’t approach you, although sometimes they will. If you see one you like the look of and you can beckon him over. In the larger clubs, ask one of the waiter staff to get the boy to come and sit with you. They all have numbers on their underwear and you just ask for number XX to come and sit for a drink. It’s expected you will buy him a drink, and all drinks go on a “tab” that is normally put in a pot in front of you.

They ask the normal questions – “What’s your name?” – “Where are you from?” and after that sometimes the boys go quiet. Don’t think they are ignoring you, quite often this is the limit of their English! You are quite welcome to enjoy their company and have a quick grope or fumble and some clubs let their lads go further than others! You will just have to “suck it and see” (Perhaps not the best phrase to use!). In some bars, you can walk by the stage, and look inside and have a quick grope in their underwear. Just place a 20 Baht tip in the waistband as a tip for this privilege. And in some of the bars they dance on your table. You can quickly run out of 20 Baht as the lads squat down and make it obvious what they are offering for a tip. But if you don’t like the look of a particular boy, don’t be worried about not taking up the offer and not tipping. Just make it obvious by not making too much eye contact.

After some fun and a drink, let’s assume you don’t want to this boy home with you, then you just say thanks and tip him 100 Baht and all is done. If you do decide to take him home, it’s also easy. First make sure you know what you want from the meeting. How far you want him to go, what role they should take and how long they are expected to stay (an hour or all night). Make sure this is agreed. Remember a lot of the boys  are not gay and won’t do all things. Some of the bars also have "short time rooms that you can hire and take the boy upstairs. The cost of these is around 500 Baht, and although not always the cleanest places, it sometimes saves a long taxi ride or might be an alternative if for any reason you don't want to take one of us home. Just ask and they can advise you.

Some are gay depending on the fee, and some are gay up for anything. Tell the boy you want to “off” him. This means you want to take him “off” from the bar. The bar makes a charge – in theory for the lost wages, but again part of this charge goes to him. Normally it’s 250 to 500 Baht and this gets added to your bill. Pay up and off you go. It’s quite acceptable to take him into another bar if this has been agreed (but I wouldn’t then change my mind and try to take a different boy). Rates for the services vary depending what you want to do and how long. Think though around 600 Baht for a quick thing, 1000 Baht for a good night – and make a point of adding 100 Baht as a “tip” for a motorbike to get back home after. The boys will not tell you how much they want. You have to give them what you will pay and they will accept the figure. Do not under pay though as the boys are often from the very poor North East of Thailand (Esan) and they not only have to pay their own bills, but also send money back home very often. Remember compared to London, Berlin or Amsterdam this is a very cheap scene. However there’s no need to be over-generous either.

It’s also possible to rent a boy for a longer term – for example a week. Take him out to the beach or better still, take him shopping - they love that! Don’t forget though you have to pay the bar fine or off fee for each night you have him. Although you may not go back into the same bar, they have to go back to work. So if you decide a longer term is for you, pop back into the bar, tell them and settle up.

A word of warning. Although all lads you encounter in the bars should be over 18, some may not be as careful at checking as you might think. If in doubt ask for ID and remember that the Thai calendar is not the same as ours. There is a difference of 543 years! So 2008 in the West is 2551 in Thailand. So for example, a boy who is 18 was born in June 2533. Underage sex is not tolerated in Thailand and although it seems a haven for pedophiles, there are numerous undercover police and other agents working in the city. They have been quite successful in identifying individuals for prosecution when they return to their home countries, while offenders are often apprehended by the Thai police.

Just remember that although it’s quite often high pressure, you’re the customer and you can always say “No thanks”. But treat the boys with respect. They do appreciate this and its part of the culture. Remember they are there to make money. They gain respect from sending money back home and as I said this is important to them. If a long term “off” starts, remember that any proffering of love, is only as deep as your wallet and lasts as long as you are here. Too many European hearts have been broken by my less scrupulous boys declaring undying love, then as soon as you’ve left they move on to the next farang (Westerner). The requests for money after a long term meeting never stop and the reasons for it are many and varied.

However I really don’t want to end up on a down note. It’s an amazing scene and you’ll have a great time. The boys are really attractive and very willing and lovely. They are short and tall, young and older, muscular and “boy next door”, well equipped and quite small, but above all – lovely. You’ll find one of the lads (or many) that will really do it for you! ENJOY.  

If this is your first time in Pattaya, you might like to have a look at these people. They provide great "hold-your-hand" tours to Pattaya. From meeting your flight, to showing you around the clubs,