A "low wai"
I could write page after page on this subject but I will try to summarise here.
The Wai is a gesture you will see everywhere and every day in Thailand. It is so very often misunderstood by foreigners but with a little thought, you will soon start to instinctively know when to wai and when not to wai.
Basically, it is a greeting and a gesture of respect or gratitude and is done by pressing your hands together and gently bowing. The depth of your bow and the height you raise your hands to on your face indicates your status in comparison to the person you are greeting. It effectively replaces the western equivalent of a handshake but there are more subtleties to a wai.
The best way to learn is by observing. For example, if you are meeting the parents of your boyfriend for the first time, or after a long absence, you would most certainly make a high wai and bow quite deeply to show the respect you have for your friend’s parents. However, when they return the wai, it may only be fleeting and they may not bow very much at all. Similarly, if you are meeting an older and superior colleague, you should again high wai and bow a little deeply.
Conversely, it is very unusual for adults to wai a youngster, even though that boy is expected to wai to you… are you getting the picture? It’s all about status. Many tourists who visit the bars of the red light districts will make complete asses of themselves by waiing a barboy or a waiter. It is absurd for you to do so as you are indicating that you have a lower status than them. They may laugh politely if you do this but secretly, they will be deriding you with their friends. It is not necessary to wai people who are in your employ, or those that are providing you with a service, such as your household staff or a taxi driver, for example.
If a barboy or waiter wais you, then a simple nod back in their direction will suffice. At most, the most cursory and fleeting of wais, low, with no bow will be adequate. You should never initiate a wai with a Thai of lower social ranking.
By far the easiest and safest thing is not to wai at all. That way you avoid looking stupid. Thais will not take offence at not getting a wai from a Westerner, whereas they might easily get upset if you get it wrong.
